A Fairway Home Companion: Big Changes Ahead

There will be some big changes for the Brown Family in the coming weeks.

In approximately 8 weeks, baby Emmy will join our family.

In about 4 weeks Aubrey will turn 2 years old.

And in 3 weeks I will leave my job to become a full-time stay at home mom!

I'm excited about all of these changes, but I'm most nervous AND excited about the last one. Staying at home full-time was never something I had the desire to do when I was pregnant with Aubrey, but God planted the desire in my heart when we found out we were pregnant this time around. The moment I found out we were having another baby I began thinking what life would be like with two children if I was working full-time. I saw images of shuffling kids to the babysitter or daycare, having to ask for time off to care for one sick kid just to turn around and need to care for the other one a few days later, and finally-- coming home at the end of the day with nothing left to give to my husband and sweet babies.

I shared my desire to be a stay at home mom with Weston and we began to pray about it. We really needed confirmation that this was the right decision for our family and that God would provide a way for us to make it happen if it was his plan. We needed confirmation in our finances, our work situations, healthcare benefits, and in peace of mind that I truly was up for the task at hand.

We prayed and talked about it for about 4-5 months and ultimately felt that God was making the way for this to work for us. He was giving us the confirmations that we specifically prayed for.

So- I'm super excited and a little bit nervous.

I'm Excited:

I will have an opportunity to really invest in the girls in a way I have never been able to before
On a normal work day, I typically get 4-5 hours of time with Aubrey. An hour or two in the morning (where I'm usually more concerned with getting myself dressed and out the door) and then a couple of hours in the evenings. I am excited for the chance to personally mold Aubrey and Emmy's characters beyond just those 4-5 hours.
We can do things like take walks and talk about the sun, grass and trees. We can play outside. We can visit the library for story time and have play dates with our friends. Big sister can learn to color, finger paint and use scissors.
I can breast feed Emmy without the pressure of having to build up a milk supply so I can go back to work.
I can visit Walmart or Target at 9am when it's dead as a door nail instead of after 5pm when the rest of civilization decides to do their shopping.
I am going to venture into the world of cloth diapering.

I'm Nervous:

I've never spent all day with a 2 year old and a newborn before. This is uncharted territory.
When someone has a doctor's appointment, I'm assuming we all have to load up an go? That doesn't sound very appealing.
Going to Target at 9am sounds great, but again... with two babies in tow? It may be more trouble that it's worth.
Will I have enough energy at the end of the day to give as much of myself to my husband as I've given to the girls all day? It is such a priority to nurture our relationship and marriage and I don't want to ever neglect that.
I think I'll miss talking to adults. I fear becoming someone who can only talk about their kids and kid things... but I can understand that when that is all you do all day, it is your world. I pray that God will show me how I can continue to be relational with adults without my children becoming the center of my universe.
Moving from dual income to a single income will require some sacrifice.
When God opens the door for you and gives you the desires of your heart.... be ready. Yes, I believe God desires to bless us... but he desires more for us to worship and serve him. When I experience his blessings, I'm always buckling down and getting ready for what he's about to move me to do. He's always working out his plan and will call me to participate- in a big or little way. I've got to be ready and open to the call. It makes me a little nervous when God moves... he's so much bigger and more powerful than I could ever imagine.

So all in all-- I hope to spend my days like this: